written by: DeJuan
I had been really contemplating what I wanted to discuss this week for the past few days and I found myself stuck in a box. Do I tackle a Twitter trending topic and break it down? Do I stick with what I told myself I’d write after finishing last week’s blog? Or do I continue to brainstorm for a timely topic? That is when it all made sense – Don’t Talk, Just Listen.
How many of you are dealing with someone right now and you don’t know what you should do? I can only begin to imagine the thoughts running through your mind this very second. What do I do? Do I keep quiet? Do I confront them? Do I let it play out? Stop! Don’t talk, just listen. Enough with asking yourself 21 questions attempting to analyze your next move. The other person will give themselves away 9 times out of 10 and essentially make it much easier for you to make a decision. I can’t speak for everyone, but after practicing this, it’s worked for me 99% of the time. As humans it’s hard for us to do two things at once. When you’re moving your lips, your ears have a hard time working as well as they should. Zip it! Listen to what’s being said; watch the actions of the other individual. It was only a few minutes ago I ended a phone call I didn’t want to have but needed to have. I put in my two cents and listened the rest of the time and went from there. Am I happy with the outcome? Not really. But I can go on about my business and not be bothered with what just happened. It’s more of a relief than anything. Thanks! J
Secondly, for those who do a lot of talking, tone it down and really listen to yourself. If that’s too hard, record your conversation or think out loud and record what you’re saying. Pardon me for keeping it real, and I’m not sure if you know this or not, but don’t you sound like a fool when you played it back? I figured as much. Enough with the shenanigans! All that running your mouth is only making you look silly and often times foolish. Many of us have heard the saying, “A wise man said don’t argue with fools because a person from a distance can’t tell who is who.” Well, it’s the truth, whether you believe it or not.
Finally, realize that in order to be a great communicator, you have to be a great listener. A common problem within failed relationships is communication. Listening will make you a better communicator not just in your relationships, but on the job, at school, wherever you may be. I’m a work in progress just as you are as well; and it’s nothing to be ashamed about. But stop making yourself look and sound silly. Don’t talk, just listen. You’ll be glad you did.
