Ladies and gentlemen, we are well underway into 2010; many of us with our resolutions still in full effect while others not so much. However, the underlying theme going into 2010 was a new you. For whatever reason you may have, taking 2010 in stride and putting fear aside was on the agenda. One of the items on the agenda for many of us was to head into 2010 with a new outlook on how we handled our relationships – myself included. Below is a list of things to work on (in no particular order) to keep this New Year, New You state of mind.
1. Improve Your Communication. This may sound redundant or a no brainer, but it’s the truth. I find myself too many times saying how important communication is in a relationship yet it’s my fair share of miscommunication that contributes to the failure of a relationship. Too many of us exhibit this behavior and the more we work on it, the happier we will be.
2. Understand Absence and Presence. A fairly difficult task to complete if you’re the clingy one in a relationship. Absence and presence is simple – know when to be around and know when not to be. Spice things up and allow your better half to miss you sometimes – that’s the absence part – and know when to be around – the presence part. What makes this behavior so important is that while the two of you are separated, both of you have the time to examine your roles in the relationship and what can be better. Allow your absence to be a time of self-rehabilitation. Both parties will benefit from this if done right.
3. Realize Perception and Reality. Do you believe perception is reality? If so, it might be in your best interest to discontinue thinking that way. Perception is nothing more than an opinion if you think about it. Example: Tiger Woods. He was viewed as an All-American-clean-cut-bible-carrying-non-swearing-faithful man until things took a turn for the worse and we found out more than a few things about him than we wanted to. Our perception was that he was damn near perfect, come to find out he’s far from it. The problem with perception rears its head when you’re proven wrong, which happens 9 times out of 10. Do yourself and the other person a favor and eliminate Perception is Reality from your behavioral catalog.
4. Yourself. Dichotomy – it’s the person you are. Hook yourself up with an accountability partner who you will hold you accountable for your actions and not allow you to get away with the foolishness that made you look silly in 2009. Your better half will see you are making an effort to be the best person you can be – not only for you, but for them.
5. Have fun. Loosen up, relax, enjoy yourself and the company you keep and have fun! That’s it. You will be surprised how much slower the gray hairs will grow in and how stress-free your life can be.
Put these to work in 2010 and watch your relationships take a turn for the better. There’s no greater feeling in a relationship than to be loved. Allow yourself and your partner to get to that level – you’ll be glad you did.
Written by: DeJuan
